Memoirs of a Gaijin  

May 16, 2007

I stood on the platform of Odakyu Sagamihara station as I had done so many hundreds (thousands?) of times in the past 34 years and never gave a second thought to where I was as it seemed so natural to me. After all, I am home again and it does feel good to be in familiar surroundings.

I heard the familiar tone signaling an approaching train and the familiar female voice informing everyone that the local train was arriving and to stand behind the yellow line. I swear that voice has never changed. I boarded the train and departed at the next stop, Sagami Ono, where I would catch the express train to Shinjuku.

As I boarded the express train I took my all too familiar spot at the opposite door where I could stare out the window as I so much enjoyed doing in the past. This was my favorite spot as these doors would not open until the stop before Shinjuku and I could daydream and observe the sights along the way without having to move. Also, it was my favorite spot during rush hour as I wouldn't be bothered.

After about 10 minutes it dawned on me that it was exactly 30 years and a little over one month that I had first stood in the same spot on the way to my first day of what would be fours years as a university student in Japan. I remembered that I thought to myself that day, "I will be riding this train four days a week for the next four years!" At the time it seemed like an eternity and the thought wasn't an entirely pleasant one as the commute was a little over an hour, but I had so much wanted to stay in Japan after serving in the military the previous four years that it was my only option and one that I really didn't mind and looked forward to with much anticipation.

As I stared out the window I began to contemplate the changes I had witnessed in a generation where I lived and along this train line. And, since I had been back to Japan like clockwork every single year since I left in 1988, I really never gave it much thought before today. The changes were slow and I never really noticed how much things had changed and how much they hadn't. To me it was like returning home. In a way it truly was as not only did I live there, but my wife, while a college student, moved to the area from Tokyo with her parents who had bought a house not far from where I lived. I have been visiting my wife's house for almost 20 years now and it really does feel like my own and I am truly treated as one of the family.

Odakyu Sagamihara, where I lived for 12 years (1973-1985), has really undergone many major changes mostly in the construction of high rise apartment buildings and condominiums otherwise known as "mansions". Gone are the one or two story buildings that surrounded the station. What used to be an empty lot that I used to practice baseball in with a few local men is now replaced by six story mansions. Many of the mom and pop shops that used to surround the station are gone and replaced by four story parking facilities or shopping buildings or, again, mansions. Many of the small restaurants, shops, and snacks on the side streets are still there though. The "Dove Store" otherwise known as Ito Yokado is now owned by 7-11 and is called 7i or 7 holdings.

The McDonalds at the station, where I first met my wife 26 years ago, and the Odakyu Ox department store have been torn down for what will be a 20 story mansion complex above the train station complete with shopping and restaurants on the first few floors. Construction began last year and they are half way through it already. If one rents or buys there, one need only take an elevator for shopping or eating and to catch the train to work. While in Japan last year we checked into buying one but they were already sold out!

The Yokohama bank where I had an account and dated a teller for a while is still there.

The roads are still narrow and have not been widened nor have any sidewalks been added. Still it is quaint and familiar. My old apartment is still there and it is one of the oldest in the neighborhood now! It looks that way too as it has not received a face lift since it was built more than 30 years ago and I was pleasantly surprised to see that the mailbox I bought when I first moved into it in 1977 is still there also. The bar across the street where I first met Mr. Suzuki has now been re-renovated as part of a house. The rest of the houses in the neighborhood are still as they were, although many have received face lifts and the older houses have been torn down and replaced by newer ones. A few of the larger houses with much land have been sold and there are now three or four houses where in the past there was one or they have been replaced by parking lots.

The Chujitsuya department store (or what we in the military used to call "The Flower Store" because of it's symbol of a flower) across from the pachinko parlor where I made my living during my last year of University has been replaced by a 10 story mansion. The mom and pop restaurant where I ate many meals 2 minutes from my apartment has also been re-renovated as part of a house. The neighborhood vegetable store, cleaners and sakaya-san (liquor store) are still there and I always make sure to say hello when I visit. The proprietors are now in their sixties or more, but they are still working as is the mama-san at the karaoke bar/snack "Tsuyuki" that I so often visited on an almost daily basis many years ago. She must be at least 70 now! Alot of the former mom and pop stores like the TV store and such are now gone replaced by huge department stores like Bic Camera, Yodobashi Camera, or Dai Kuma.

I still see my Japanese friends every visit and we are now in our 50's or 60's and some are, or set to become, grandparents and some have passed on. Still, it is like nothing ever changed between us. We reminisce about the times we used to go out "girl hunting" (is that phrase still used today?) at discos in Roppongi and smoking weed, and carrying the Omikoshi (shrine) at festivals on weekends and the weekend local baseball games. We remember the motorcycle rides late at night and on the weekends and staying one step ahead of the police and the beginnings of Karaoke on 8 track tapes in snacks when we had to pay 100 yen for each song! I could go on and on, but I guess you get the picture.

As the train made its way towards Shinjuku I also noticed many changes along the way. The majority of the Odakyu line from Sagami Ono to Shinjuku is now four tracks instead of two to accommodate the express trains and the "Romance Car" luxury express and construction is still going on expanding that line. All of the local stations have been expanded accommodate 10 cars instead of four, and mansions abound now at many of the stations. I remember when Shin-Yurigaoka was built and was nothing but empty fields. Today, those fields are now replaced by houses, many houses, and department stores and what have you. Siejo Gakkuen Mae station used to above ground. Today it is underground as is Yamato station going towards/coming from Fujisawa and Enoshima.

The US Army hospital I used to work at Sagami Ono is gone, replaced by stores and a housing complex, and the station itself has been rebuilt into a huge shopping complex with a bus and taxi depot. As a matter of fact, it is quite nice to be able to take the bus from Narita airport to Sagami Ono station now and then a short taxi ride home.

I turned and noticed the people sitting in their seats or standing. Back in the day people would read on the train or listen to mini radios with an earplug for entertainment, or just sleep and nothing has changed much in that department. My first experience into something really technological for the train was when the Sony Walkman first debuted in about 1979. You just weren't cool if you didn't have one on the train or when walking. It was a great experience to be able to listen to your own favorite music on a cassette tape anywhere and anytime you desired, inside your home or outside. Today many people take that experience for granted. As I glance around the train today I see the majority of people looking down at cell phones and texting or reading whatever on their phones. What a change. I felt so out of place not looking at a phone that I actually thought about taking my US cell phone out of my bag and opening it just to look like I belonged! How lame is that? As has always been the case in Japan and elsewhere, people tend to shut themselves off from the rest of the world while on the train by reading, listening to music or just sleeping. No one said a word to anyone. It's amazing how quite Japanese trains can be.

Trains didn't start to be air-conditioned until around 1978 and I believe by 1985 they were all air-conditioned. It was sheer torture riding one in rush hour with just an overhead fan. Often it was I who opened a window for air and a breeze as most Japanese didn't want to be the first to make the move! And the air-conditioner would not be turned on until the first week in June regardless of how hot it was.

Also, back then air conditioning was an unaffordable luxury and I never had one until 1985! The only places that had "air con" were a few department stores and coffee shops and, of course, pachinko parlors. How did I survive the summers and sleep at night? Open windows, mosquito killer incense, and an oscillating fan, that's how! But I do look back on the sultry summers with a sense of nostalgia!

There is now a recording in English on the trains informing people of the next stop and even the station map above the doors is now digitalized and in both English and Japanese. Man, I sure could've used that when I first started living in Japan, but then again I may have not taken the time to memorize the Kanji for all the stations.

I am just amazed that in 30 years overall prices have hardly moved. Coke and juice is still around 100 yen and cans are usually 350ml now, but there are still the smaller cans for sale at the same price. Apartment prices are very reasonable now and a 2DK apartment about a 10 minute walk from the station can still be rented for around 30-50,000 yen/month and a mansion goes for 50-80,000 yen or more. I paid 30,000 yen/month for the 2DK place (with bath!) I rented 30 yrs ago seven minutes from the station! A 3LDK mansion can be bought for anywhere from 19,000,000 yen on up to 40,000,000 yen for a brand new one near, or on, the station! That is very reasonable in my opinion and comparable to any major city in the US. Even a decent house can be bought for around 20,500,000 to 30,000,000 yen these days. The reason why I left Japan in 1988 was because the price of the mansion I wanted to buy went from 8,000,000 yen to 28,000,000 yen in 2 1/2 years! And that was in the boonies of Yokohama! Also, you couldn't buy a house for under 40,000,000 yen at the peak of the boom. Yes, housing and land prices have really come down since I left.

A medium bottle of beer can still be had for around 5-600 yen in a snack although it is still expensive to buy beer in a store and it is still 5-600 yen for a whisky and water! The price for a loaf of Yamazaki bread is still around 150 yen and food prices have remained relatively stable. Unbelievable! The biggest change I have seen, other than housing, is in the price of whiskey both imported and domestic. I could hardly believe that a bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey could now be bought in Japan for less than I'd pay for the same bottle here in Tennessee where it is made! Beer in Japan is still expensive, but at least there is Chu Hai with 7% alcohol content! I could drink that stuff forever as it tastes like soda pop with a hell of a kick! Plus, there are now a variety of cheap beers for about half the price of premium beers.

It is really cheaper to eat in McDonalds in Japan than it is in the US and I remember when the first "Makudonaludo's" appeared in the mid 70's! When the one opened at Odakyu Sagamihara station in about 1974 my friend and I ate two Big Macs each that day! Also, for about 1,200 (US$3.60) you could eat all you want for lunch at Shakey's Pizza back then.

Clothing prices in Japan are now reasonable, especially if you shop at Uni Qlo. There, you could buy clothing for what you would pay in the states or less. Cosmetics and personal hygiene products, for both men and women, are still way over priced as they always were. Prices for fiber-optic, high speed cable is way cheaper than I pay for broadband here in the US! Here I pay $55/month for broadband at about 1mb/sec and forget fiber-optic. That is not due for 3-4 years! Cable TV is another $50 for just basic cable and no premium channels!

Yen is now around 123/US$. When I left permanently in 1988 it was 128! Not much of a change if you ask me.

Don't be fooled into believing that all of Japan is more expensive than the US or maybe your own industrialized country. In my experience and opinion it is no less expensive to live in my small suburb of Tokyo/Yokohama than living here in the suburbs of Nashville, Tennessee and that includes housing!

One thing I have always noticed for 30 years and the same holds true today is that, if someone sits next to you on a train, male or female, and they are studying the English language, they will more often than not pull out that book or text and read it while seated next to you. Coincidence? I don't know. Back in the day it was an easy way to make a friend or meet someone of the opposite sex if you said something like, "Are you studying English?" It still amazes me to this day and at my age (52), how many people of both sexes still do it as their way of maybe saying, "I know a little English and would like to meet/talk to you, but I am too shy and not sure if you speak English also." One person even pulled out the NHK book in French. Granted, most of the people that did it this last trip were closer to my age than in the past, but there was one younger female in her late twenties or early thirties who did this that I thought, "If only I were..." Anyway, I digress.

People do seem a little more withdrawn and a little more shut off from society these days, but then again, the Japanese always seemed to be that way, especially the younger generation. I guess the advance in technology today enables them to be more withdrawn. In a way I kind of understand as I spend way too much time on my computer and the internet these days myself and can get lost in a world all to myself complete with video chats with people from not only Japan but all over the world.

TV has not changed in all these years. The programming is still basically the same with the famiry doramas, silly game shows, sports, cartoons, morning shows for housewives, mystery dramas in the evening that always include a murder, and the sexual content on late night TV etc.

As the train made it way towards Shinjuku, had I not been back every year I think I would be shocked at the numerous 20 story or more skyscrapers now dotting the skyline in one of the most earthquake prone countries in the world as well as the numerous, high story mansions now popping up everywhere! I wonder what will happen when the "big one" hits as is inevitable. I guess only time will tell. They sure must've made some great strides in quake-proofing buildings.

Yes, Japan has changed very much on the outside these past 30 years, but for all its changes, at least on the inside, culturally, it remains the same and has not really changed that much to me. Unknown neighbors still greet even a foreigner with a slight head nod and an "Ohayo" or "Konnichiwa" and hardly anyone is shocked to hear a foreigner speaking Japanese. There is hardly any finger pointing and giggles from Japanese school kids as in the past when they encounter a foreigner and I don't believe I have experienced it in many years. I have also noticed that the Japanese, overall, are now not so shocked to see a foreigner or have one walk into their place of business and I have yet to experience being turned away from a place like a bar or snack if I walk in alone. There is much less "panic" than in the past. I guess knowing the language a bit and not being afraid to use it or make mistakes helps, I don't know.

As I exited the train at Shinjuku I made my way quickly, but silently, like an expert walking through a maze, through the crowds towards the JNR train that would take me to my destination. Damn, it is crowded this afternoon, but I am home and I do so much love it crowds and all.

Some may think that I am trying to relive my past or living in a fantasy world, but I beg to differ as Japan is more home to me and I am more comfortable there than in my own country and I have lived here in Tennessee for 18 1/2 years now. Still, it is only temporary, like being assigned overseas for a company or something, and I yearn for the day in a few short years when I will return "home" permanently. Maybe it will sink in when I am turned down for my first house or mansion, but it's not like I've never experienced it before and it really doesn't bother me as I know, sooner or later, I will find what I am looking for. Plus, I know Japan is not perfect and has its warts, but doesn't everywhere?

I understand that the past can never be recaptured, but it is fun to relive some of the most memorable times of my entire life. Maybe it's because I became an adult in Japan and stayed for so long, I don't know. Thomas Wolfe wrote a book entitled "You Can't Go Home Again", showing that one can really never capture one's past and that people change and the home one remembers exists only in the past. Apparently he has never lived in Japan because, to me, more than 30 years later, Japan has hardly changed and the past and present seem as one, only it is a lot more modern on the outside and relatively unchanged on the inside.

I have Diverticulitis which sometimes becomes inflamed and I have to go to the doctor to receive antibiotics. The pain subsides within 24 hrs and disappears after about three days. My last problem with it occurred about 4 yrs ago.

Well, while I was visiting Japan these past few weeks it became inflamed and within 24 hrs I developed a slight fever and knew I would have to go see a doctor or go to the hospital. I was a little concerned as I had no national health insurance, but it had to be done regardless of the cost.

My wife called a doctor in the neighborhood and an appointment was made for an hour later. It was a Saturday morning and I figured it would probably be crowded. I had not received medical care in Japan since the 80's when I was living there full time and, not knowing the cost, we took 60,000 yen with us as, in the US, with no health insurance the cost would probably be at least $200 if not more.

We walked the 10 minutes to the small clinic and upon entering, after removing our shoes and using the slippers (pink for females, blue for males) I was amazed that there were only two patients there, an elderly gentleman and a woman with a baby. This was surprising for a Saturday morning as in the US on a Saturday the offices are booked solid and one must wait at least an hour over ones scheduled "appointment".

The nurse behind the counter took my basic information and asked that I take a seat and said the doctor would see me shortly. Unlike the US there were no pages and pages of info to fill out for a first time visit.

Within 10 minutes the doctor called us in and I noticed his diploma on the wall from Tokyo University. I explained my situation to him in Japanese with help from my wife and what kind of penicillin I usually take for the symptoms. He understood what I was talking about, checked his computer for reference and asked that I lie down. Locating the pain on the left side of my abdomen he asked that I take a urine test. I left the cup on the counter in the restroom and as soon as I returned to the room he said that my urine was ok. Now that was fast!

He said that he would give me a 5 day prescription for antibiotics and pain killers and that if the pain did not subside within 24 hrs that I was to return. We went to the counter and we were given the medicine right there! No pharmacy to go to! Our bill was calculated and it was presented to us.

To my astonishment the total bill for the visit, urine test and two prescriptions was 4,610 yen!! Approximately US$38 at the current exchange rate. And that was with no National Health Insurance! My wife and I looked at each other with wide open eyes. I asked her if this was the normal cost and she asked the nurse. Yes it was and they apologized for the cost with my having no health insurance. Unbelievably reasonable in my opinion and there was no need for them to apologize if they knew the cost of such a visit in the US. It was way lower than either of us expected. I felt as if I had won the lottery or something.

I calculated the cost of what this would have cost me in the US WITH insurance. The co-pays for the doctor, urine test, and two prescriptions at a pharmacy would have come out to about $60 and, with no insurance the cost would have been at least $200! This just goes to show how unreasonable medical costs are in the US.

Anyway, within a couple of days I was fine and my visit to Japan was not interrupted at all as I was still able to function thanks to the pain killers and had a wonderful time drinking beer and eating all kinds of food in Shinjuku with my friends two days later. I am very grateful that in Japan you are not ripped off for emergency medical care even if you have no health insurance and are a foreigner.

Therefore, if you are visiting Japan and become ill, don't fear that it will cost you an arm and a leg if you have to receive care as the costs are very reasonable to one without insurance.

Are the Japanese really an honorable and honest people as most people seem to think or are they just like everybody else? A lot of people seem to think they are. Some say it is because they are of one race and ethnicity. Some say it's because of the group mentality thinking. Others say it's because of their deep rooted culture based on codes of the samurai with bushido and the similar codes of the Yakuza. Others say it's because of their morals and upbringing. And, still, others say it's because of the dense population and close proximity to each other that one has to think about another's feelings so as not to disturb their "Wa" (harmony). I don't know the correct answer, but I do know one thing, and that is, in one experience of mine, I was grateful that at least one person was honest and honorable.

This experience occurred when I was a university student. I also had a part-time job teaching English to businessmen and college students at a small school I worked at during the week and on Saturdays. We were always paid in cash on the 25th of the month. I had adopted the bad habit of carrying around one of those long rectangular wallets that I had received as a gift from a friend of mine. Maybe you've seen them. They are thin, sometimes made out of leather or silk, and are long enough to hold Japanese bills without them being folded. A lot of businessmen carry one in the inside breast pocket of their suit jacket as do many Yakuza and Chinpira (young Yakuza in Training)

It was a fashion trend back then to have one prominently sticking out of your back pocket as it kind of made you look cool and fashionable. (And we all know how important it is to be fashionable and "with the times" in Japan.) Why they were carried like that I don't know because they could easily be lifted from your back pocket and pickpockets are well known in Japan. However, I was told that that was rare.

Anyway, to look like I "belonged" and cool, I started carrying one about two months prior. When I got paid this particular day, I put the twelve 10,000 notes in the wallet, stuffed it in my back pocket and started out for home after my classes ended at 9pm. I got a seat on the train and slept most of the way.

When I got to my train station I proceeded up the stairs with the crowd to the ticket taker. I reached around for my wallet to show my train pass and it was gone! It had everything in there, my train pass, my money, my bank card, important phone numbers, student ID, etc. Luckily it didn't have my gaijin card in there as back then it was a little booklet that wouldn't fit in any kind of wallet and I always kept it in the other back pocket.

It's amazing how many thoughts can go through one's head in a split second. I instantly panicked thinking how I was going to pay my rent and bills this month. I knew for sure right then and there that I would never see it again and it was gone forever. I figured I was pick-pocketed while walking to the train or getting off. With Shinjuku station being so crowded and with the crowd getting off the train, I could understand how easily someone could have lifted it without my ever knowing it.

I explained my plight to the ticket taker and he pointed me to an office. I went in and explained my predicament to the station master. He asked me for a complete description of the wallet and its contents. He also asked for proof of who I was and luckily I had my gaijin card. I explained that I probably lost it after I got on the Odakyu line at Shinjuku as I had to show my train-pass for entry. He wrote everything down and made a few phone calls to the major express stops along the Odakyu line. From his conversations I knew he wasn't having any luck. After his last phone call to Shinjuku station he hung up the phone, looked at me apologetically, and said that I might have better luck checking back with him in the morning.

Even though our conversation was conducted in Japanese, he never seemed surprised that I could speak Japanese, nor did he try to speak to me in English. He was professional throughout and treated me, I guess, as he would any Japanese person.

I went down the stairs of the train station and walked home in utter despair. I kept thinking how stupid I was to carry that thing in my pocket like that knowing that it could've been so easily lifted. I had no money on me whatsoever save for a couple of 100 yen and other coins and the banks and ATM's were closed. Being single, I usually ate dinner out as it only cost 4 or 500 yen and I couldn't even eat that night. I did have some ramen, eggs and bread at home though, so it wouldn't be a total loss.

When I got home, I was still so despondent that I wasn't even hungry. I just sat at my kotatsu and stared into space thinking about the 120,000 plus yen that I had just lost. I quickly did some calculating, got out my bank book, and figured that all was not that bad as I still had just enough money in the bank to pay my rent and bills and buy a new train pass. Then I thought about my student ID as I couldn't buy a student-discount train pass without one; and my bank card. I couldn't even go to an ATM. It would take a couple of days to get a new student ID and at least a week to get a new bank card.

After about an hour or so I thought that I was not going to let this screw up my life. It's gone and there's nothing I can do about it. I chalked it up to a "stupid tax" that one pays going through life's experiences. Besides, there is still tomorrow. Even if I just got back the wallet with my student ID and train pass I would be happy as the train pass cost me about 7,500 yen for a three month pass and I just bought it the previous month!

I was now feeling a bit hungry and decided that I was going to go out to eat and get drunk. I wandered over to the little snack across the street from my apartment and asked the mama-san if I could pay her tomorrow and explained what had happened to me. Without so much as a second thought she told me not to worry about it and that I could pay tomorrow or whenever I could. I quickly ordered a beer and some food.

After a while my good friend Suzuki-san walked in with his ever present dog, Jiro, on his back. Mama-san explained to him what had happened. He immediately said that he was paying my tab that night and I was not to worry. As I ate and we talked, I thought about what a great country this is and what good friends I had made. Here a foreigner loses his months pay and his Japanese friends step in to help him out. Mr. Suzuki even offered me 10,000 yen to tide me over, but I refused as I told him I would be going to the bank in the morning.

We drank and sang a few songs and then I went home. As I lay in the futon waiting for sleep to befall me, I still couldn't stop thinking about the lost wallet.

I awoke the next morning, started up the kerosene heater, put my futon away, made some coffee and watched a little TV. After about an hour I got out my bank book and my hanko (official seal with my name on it), put them in my bag, turned off the heater, and ventured on up to the train station and the station masters office in the hopes that someone may have found my wallet and turned it in. But I still highly doubted it.

The station master was a different person, but he had all my information. When I told him who I was he said, "hai, hai," yes, yes, and went on to explain that my wallet had indeed been found and I could pick it up at Hon-Atsugi station, a short distance away, as that was where it was turned in. I breathed a sigh of relief and asked him if there was any money in it. He said he didn't know. I was just so glad that at least I might get back the train pass, my student ID card, and my bank card. I wasn't so much worried about the train pass and my bank card as, unless it was a young person who pick-pocketed me, they wouldn't be able to use my train pass as it had "STUDENT" stamped in bold kanji on it. Also, they couldn't use my bank card either as they didn't know my PIN number.

As I had enough money to buy a ticket to Hon-Atsugi, I didn't bother wasting any time going to the bank as, if my money was indeed stolen, I would go to the bank at Hon-Atsugi station. I purchased a ticket and a can of hot coffee from one of the vending machines and sat on the bench waiting for my train to arrive.

It was a sunny day. A brisk March wind was blowing and I was warmed by the coffee. It was one of those days when the sun was bright, the air was crisp with just a hint of spring, the sky was picture perfect blue, and you were just glad to be alive. I just hoped I would feel the same after getting my wallet back.

After about five minutes I heard the familiar female voice announcing that the train was arriving and to stay behind the yellow line. I boarded the first car as I usually did and stood behind the engineer as I always enjoyed the view from this perspective.

Five stops later I was at Hon-Atsugi and found my way to the station masters office. I told him who I was and produced my gaijin card as proof. He asked me to identify the contents in detail and I did. He then went around a partition and after a few agonizingly long minutes came back. He had my wallet and a piece of paper in his hand. I was relieved as all hell. He laid my wallet on the counter and explained that the piece of paper he was giving me had the name, address, and phone number of the person who had found my wallet and turned it in. He said that I should call them and thank them. I said that I would. He asked if he should write the information in romaji and I told him that he needn't bother as I could read Japanese. He then asked me to check the contents of the wallet. As I opened it I was dumbfounded that every single item in my wallet was still there right down to the money! Nothing was missing, not even a 500 yen note! It was all there! I signed a piece of paper accepting my wallet and it's contents and that nothing was missing. This time I put my wallet in my bag and vowed that I would use a normal wallet from now on. No more trying to look cool.

As I left the station masters office I bowed and thanked him and headed for my train back home. I still couldn't help but be awestruck that my wallet was turned in and that nothing was missing. I really expected the money to be gone at least. If this happened in the States, I'm sure I'd never see it again. The odds there were against me especially with all that cash in it. But some kind person may just as well have turned it in there also.

As I rode the train home I just couldn't get over it. I had heard that the Japanese were an honest people, but this was just unbelievable. I looked at the paper and the name on it written in Japanese. It was a woman's name and she lived in Atsugi city.

After I got to my own station I went immediately to a phone booth and dialed the number. A lady answered and it was she. I immediately guessed she was probably in her 40's or so and told her who I was. I thanked her for finding my wallet and turning it in. She seemed more worried than I was as it had my bank card and train pass in it. She said that she noticed it on the seat of the train after I had gotten off. As the doors were already closed, she decided to turn it in at her station after finding no phone number for me in the wallet. She said that she worried about it all night as she knew I would be bothered by my loss. Leave it to the Japanese to be more concerned about the other person! She complimented me on my Japanese and I thanked her profusely and finally said good bye. Come to think of it, I'm sure I was also bowing my head while thanking her on the phone.

After hanging up the phone I immediately went to a nearby post office where I purchased an envelope. I asked for a sheet of paper from the postal person and wrote a thank you note in Japanese to this kind lady. After I signed my name, I reached into my bag for my wallet, opened it and removed a 10,000 yen note. I placed the note in the envelope and sealed it up; wrote down her address in Japanese and turned it in to the postal person. I had learned somewhere that it is a custom in Japan to pay a reward to the person finding, and turning in, a lost item. I fulfilled this custom.

As I left the post office and headed home I was more than happy that I was living in a country where some people do think about, and feel for others, including foreigners. The golden rule, so far as I knew, applied to Japan. And, as a side note, I still have that green silk wallet to this day. Once in a while I'll go through my boxes, see it, and remember this experience.

Anyone who has lived for any length of time in Japan and knows a little bit of the language and culture knows the word chikan. The meaning of this word is a molester, but basically refers to a male who is prone to be a Peeping Tom, stealing woman's underwear from their clothes lines, or even groping woman on the trains, catching a quick feel here and there, or pressing themselves into females. In other words, a pervert!

You can sometimes spot chikan ogling young school girls in their sailor uniforms. A brave woman or girl being molested or felt up on a train might blurt out, "chikan!" to warn others of his presence and have him taken down by others or arrested at the next train stop. It is because of this all too common practice in Japan and the prevalence of many chikan that nowadays there are "women only" cars during rush hour.

The female counterpart of chikan is "chijo" and basically has the same meaning, only referring to a female. And yes there are some chijo in Japan, but they are rare or hardly reported to the police. I mean what hot blooded male, in his right mind, would report that he was felt up by a woman on a train or other location other than to let all his friends know about it? I know I wouldn't. And I didn't report it either when it happened to me.

Yes, I was groped, or molested, or whatever you want to call it on a train by a female when I was a college student in Japan. I was shocked and awed at what happened, but I didn't feel I was molested. No way, no how! In fact, after I got over the initial shock, I kind of enjoyed it and let her "take advantage" of me so to speak. Or at least, after I understood just what the hell was going on, let her "have her way with me." This is the story of that one and only experience I ever had with a chijo.

I was on my way back home from the university during rush hour and I didn’t feel like waiting 20 minutes at the platform in Shinjuku for a seat on the Odakyu Express train that originated from there. I wanted to get home so I took my place in line for the next express train. I was ninth in the double line, so I knew I would not be getting a seat.

When the train arrived and all the people emptied out the left side of the train, the doors on the right side opened and everyone near the front scrambled for a seat. People are so desperate for a seat, especially after waiting 20 minutes, that they practically knock each other out of the way! Since I was so far back in the line I couldn't get my favorite standing spot next to the door and was stuck standing near the door in the middle of the aisle. The train was crowded, but not very. I knew it would get worse at Yoyogi Uehara and Shimo Kitazawa, the next two express stops.

As usual, the crowd at Shimo Kitazawa at this time of the evening was large and the people were packed into the train. I mean we were so packed in that I didn’t have to hold on to anything as the throng of people and the closeness of our bodies would keep me from losing my balance. That's how close we were. It was so crowded that I hardly had any room to fold my magazine in quarters to read it.

As the train pulled out of the station all the people kind of moved backwards with the forward momentum of the train. One woman who had her back to me leaned into me with her butt and back. As the train gained speed and we were able to stand I kind of backed away from her an inch or so as I didn't want her to think I was pressing into her or anything that may make her yell, "chikan!" and get me arrested or something.

It was about an 8-10 minute ride to the next express stop so I just got as comfortable as I could and began to read my magazine. To my astonishment the same woman in front of me moved back a little and placed her butt squarely in my crotch. I was startled and moved backward maybe a centimeter or so as there was virtually no room for me to move back much. I no sooner did that than she did it again. At first I thought it was an accident and, as there was no more room for me to move back without my pressing my butt into some guys crotch, I kind of arched my hips back a bit so my crotch wouldn't be touching her butt. I no sooner did that than, again, she moved her butt against my crotch for a second time. Now I knew this was no accident. She was doing it on purpose.

I had heard that there were women, chijo, who sometimes did this on the train, but I had never personally experienced it myself in seven years of living there. I had heard that they did things similar to what chikan do, and I had even heard secondhand stories about how they would even grab a man's crotch or massage his butt. Now I was experiencing it for the first time. Call me crazy, but I am a male and I was not about to let this experience with a chijo pass me by. If she was pitching, I was catching.

As she continued to press her butt into my crotch, I straightened up and, ever so lightly, proceeded to press my crotch back against her butt. The harder I pressed, the harder she pressed back and the harder I got! I remember thinking to myself, this is no accident. She's actually encouraging this! So I pressed against her all the more. I shyly glanced around to make sure no one was looking at us, but it was really too crowded for anyone to really notice as we so packed together.

Throughout the entire ride to the next stop we pressed against each other so much it was as if we were making love. In a way we were making love. She would move her butt ever so slowly against my crotch in a circular motion, side to side, and then up and down a little. I couldn't believe how aroused I had become and I responded in kind. All the while she had her head down pretending to read a book she had in her hands.

I never once saw her face, but I guessed she was in her 20's. She had long black hair and was wearing what seemed to be a business suit. I could smell the hint of a nice perfume and the nice fragrance of her long shiny black hair. The top of her head came up to about my chin and we played our little "love making" game until the train pulled into the next station; her pressing against me and me responding in kind. I was so hard I couldn't believe it. I thoroughly enjoyed her pressing her soft round butt against my rock hard crotch and enjoyed every minute of it. Any minute now and I knew I would have an orgasm.

As the train pulled into Seijo Gakkuen Mae station and the doors opened, she abruptly got off much to my dismay. I tried as best I could to get a look at her, but she had her head turned completely away from me, (probably on purpose) and I never even got a sideways glance at her face as she blended in with, and disappeared into the crowd. If she was beautiful I never knew, but I like to imagine she was as beautiful as my wildest fantasy.

As quite a few people got off at this station there was now room for me to stand in relative comfort and I took my usual place against the door for the remaining 20 minutes or so ride home. For obvious reasons I faced the door. The little tease had left me high and dry and frustrated, and I couldn't wait to get home to "take care of my frustration!" Man was I turned on!

However, it was an experience I would never forget and I often think about it, with a smile, to this day, some 26 years later, of the chijo who had the nerve to molest a foreigner on a crowded train in Japan. (Something told me this was not her first experience.)

If chijo ever became so prevalent in Japan that they had to have separate cars for men, women, and mixed, I'm pretty sure the men only cars would be empty or filled with men looking to have an experience with other men. I know I would not ride in a men only car. Co-ed all the way for me! I mean what hetero man in his right mind would ride in a male only car?

When I relayed this experience to my Japanese friends, both male and female, they didn't seem all that surprised and both had said that, although rare, it is not unheard of for chijo to do that on trains. Maybe that is why men do it. Maybe, they are making the first move hoping they are interacting with, or hoping to find, a chijo. I don't know. In my case it never happened again with a female although I have had more than a few men press themselves up against me both before and after this unique experience. In those cases, I either moved out of the way, got off at the next stop and then back on again, or found another spot quickly in the same or another car. But I didn't make a scene and they never persisted or I may have ended up being arrested for assaulting someone.

Some of my Japanese friends even hinted that "she" might have been a male transvestite. I say who cares! If "she" was, so what! My mind, at the time, didn't know the difference and thought for sure it was a woman and that's all that mattered at the time.

After that exhilarating experience I often didn't mind taking a crowded train at rush hour and kind of looked forward to it. In fact I often made it a point to take a crowded train for a while after that experience. But, I never experienced it again. And, I would never make the first move myself and press myself against a woman on purpose for fear of being called a chikan and maybe getting arrested. It is just not my style.

As a matter of fact, groping and the feeling up of women on trains has become so prevalent these days that the train companies in Japan are forced to have women only cars during the rush hour, especially in the mornings. Also, there are more than a few women these days on trains who yell "chikan!" and blame some innocent man for groping them when they never touched them. They do this so they can extort money from them in lieu of pressing charges. Therefore, if you happen to find yourself on a crowded train in Japan these days be real leery of any woman pressing herself up against you as she may just be trying to trap you.

Whoever you are, chijo-san, you gave a young man an experience he'll never forget and one he'll fondly cherish forever. And for that, being a hot blooded male at the time, I thank you. Heck, I would even savor it with as much delight today as I did back then, but times are different.

When I became a student and moved off base I opened a bank account at the Bank of Yokohama near the station. As I had an ATM card all my withdrawals and deposits were done at the machine and I never used the tellers save for the one time each month I would need to pay my bills and rent.

Going to a Japanese bank is far different than going to a bank in the US and can be a very time consuming ordeal that may take 30 minutes or more just to pay a few bills and your rent or even to deposit some money if you didn't use the ATM machine. A form must first be filled out with your name in Japanese and stamped with your personal name stamp (hanko). You then place your money and form, along with the bills into a tray at the counter and a teller will usually give you a number and you have to wait until your number or name is called. Your tray is then passed among 3-5 people sitting at desks behind the counter who methodically check it and place their own stamps on it. After what seems like an eternity, your name is called and you receive your tray with your change and receipts along with a bow and a thank you from the teller who served you.

There wasn't much I disliked while living in Japan, but I did dislike having to go to the bank. What unusual experience could come out of simply going to a bank you may ask? Well, you are about to find out.

One day I went in to pay my rent and was waited on by your typical female teller in her late 20's whom I had never seen before. She was tall for a Japanese woman, and had short black hair. She was dressed in a blue skirt and a matching vest with a white shirt and small, blue cross tie. The small white name tag on the left side of her vest had "Takahashi" printed on it. We hardly spoke, but she was impressed that I could speak and write Japanese and she mentioned that she spoke a little English. She asked what I did and I told her I was a university student.

Throughout the transaction she was very professional and I didn't give her a second thought when I left. However, I did notice the unusual, long eye contact she made with me even though our encounter was brief. Most people, especially at banks and other places of business, when they encounter a foreigner (maybe even Japanese for that matter), will hardly make any eye contact with them even if they do speak Japanese never mind hold a small conversation with them.

A couple of days later I get a phone call at home at about 9 pm. It is this same female teller that waited on me at the bank. She apologized for calling me at home and I instantly thought I had left something there or didn't fill out my forms properly. But that wasn't the case at all. As it turned out she was calling me to ask me to dinner!

I was completely taken by surprise as this was most unusual for a Japanese female to be so forward. Being single and not attached to anyone, I agreed to meet her at a time of her choosing after giving her my schedule for the coming week. I remember thinking that she wasn't especially attractive or anything like that. In fact she wasn't even my type. I agreed to meet her more out of curiosity as she was so forward and I wanted to find out more about this woman who had the guts to call a strange male foreigner at home and ask him out.

Afterwards, I wondered how she got my number and figured that she must've gotten it from my records. This is even more unusual as what she did was probably against the law or the rules of her company and she could probably get into big trouble if I complained. Now I really wanted to meet this woman who would take a chance like that.

We met a few days later after she finished work at 7 pm and went to a nearby Denny's. We talked and I found out her name was Kumiko. She lived alone only a few stops from me at Ebina station, has worked at this particular branch for three years, studied English while at university, was born and raised in Niigata, enjoyed playing tennis, and liked foreign movies and music. She said she never dated a foreigner before but was extremely attracted to me because I could speak Japanese and wanted to get to know me. She was also 28 and I was 24. She offered to pay the tab for dinner since it was she who invited me out, but I wouldn't allow it. After a little back and forth haggling over the tab we agreed to split it and I told her that the next place was on me.

After dinner we went for a couple of drinks and something to eat at a nearby "snack" that I knew where we talked some more. During our talk she mentioned that she always wanted to meet foreigners, but due to her lack of converstional ability never tried and, since I could speak Japanese, she thought this was her chance to finally meet one. After an hour or so I then walked her to the station and we agreed to meet again the following Saturday night at her station (her suggestion). I thought about inviting her to my apartment, but I didn't want to be too aggressive on a first date and give her the wrong impression. Also, the encounter did not make me any more attracted to her, but she was still interesting nonetheless and had a good sense of humor.

The following Saturday night we met again and went to an Izakaya where we drank beer and ate all kinds of Japanese food a la carte for a couple of hours. Our conversations were mostly in Japanese with a little English thrown in here and there. Her English ability was not all that bad. She just needed a little practice.

After a while she asked if I wanted to go to her apartment. Since I had no other plans, of course I said yes. What single male wouldn't? Besides, even though I was not attracted to her in a physical sense, I still wanted to know more about her.

Kumiko's apartment was about a 15 minute walk and consisted of two rooms: a six mat room and a small kitchen. In the six mat room was a small kotatsu (small table with a removable top for the placement of a quilt, with a heat lamp under it to keep the feet and legs warm in winter), a single bed, a TV, a radio, a phone, and a couple of other items of furniture along with a kerosene heater. The small kitchen had a small refrigerator and stove, and the bath and toilet were located in separate rooms on the right.

I sat at the kotatsu, warmed my feet, and leaned against the bed while she put on the TV, opened the window a crack and lit the heater. While she did this I glanced around the room that had a definite feminine touch with quite a few stuffed animals on the bed and cute little stuffed animals in various places around the room. A tennis racket hung from the wall along with a few pictures of what I gathered to be she and her friends. Then she grabbed a couple of beers from the small refrigerator and brought some Japanese seaweed potato chips and some dried squid. In the Japanese custom she poured my beer and then I hers. While we sat on the floor drinking and eating we continued to talk about all kinds of things and, when the conversation lulled for a bit, we watched TV.

After a while she mentioned that it was getting late and that, if I wanted, I could at stay her place. That is unless I wanted to catch the last train home and had other plans tomorrow. I thought about it for a millisecond and told her I would stay if it was alright as I was feeling pretty good and really didn't feel like going home.

Now I was in a kind of conundrum here. Was she asking me to stay because she was being friendly in a Japanese sense and was comfortable with me, or did she want to sleep with me? Having been in Japan more than five years now I knew that persons of the opposite sex sometimes asked one to stay at their place as a courtesy or sign of friendship and not as an indication that there would be sex. Japan can be strange in this sense, especially for a foreign male, and one has to know how to tread lightly here. One misstep and you could screw things up. But she had showed no signs, in either her words or her body language, to lead me to believe that she was interested in me in a sexual way. Still I found it fascinating that a woman would ask a man to stay at her place on the second date.

Now if this were a woman I had met in a bar or other place frequented by foreign males, I would know immediately that her intention was to probably sleep with me as it had happened a few times in the past and the signs were quite clear. However, this was different and I didn't know how to read her just yet.

We talked for a while longer and I decided that she was just being friendly. Soon she asked if I'd like to take a bath before bed. Still she made no advances to me, nor I towards her. Knowing the Japanese custom on baths, of course I said yes.

She proceeded to heat up the bath while I sat there sipping on a second beer racking my brain to figure out her intentions. Not wanting to be too forward (read: I was too shy) I decided that she was just being friendly as she had made no advances towards me nor I towards her and I received none of the "signals" or innuendos I was so used to with Japanese women. The only other time a woman had invited me home as a friendly gesture was when I met my first wife some five years earlier.

I quickly drank my beer and decided that I would be "too drunk" to do anything with her besides sleep just to be on the safe side. My mind wanted this, but my hormones were dictating something else and I had to put them to "sleep".

We continued to have small talk until the bath was ready. She brought out a pair of her oversized sweats for me to wear and I changed in the kitchen and took my bath. I left the door unlocked in case she wanted to join me (as had happened to me in the past), but she didn't. The sweats fit quite well for, as I said, she was tall for a Japanese woman. In fact she was almost my height and I was 5' 9".

After my bath she went into the kitchen and did the same while I drank down another beer and munched on the snacks while watching TV and warming my feet under the kotatsu. (Man do I love kotatsu's). I distinctly heard the click of the lock on the door and thought, Ok, she's just being friendly by asking me to stay.

Now I was feeling real good and was getting quite inebriated and was really not quite feeling up to initiating sex with her. This was a good thing I thought. Besides, if I were a "gentleman" tonight, I thought, it may pay "dividends" later on if the relationship developed further.

After her bath she came back into the room in her pink pajamas and sat down. Seeing that my beer was gone she brought another. Now I was really getting drunk, my hormones were "asleep" and I had no intentions whatsoever of being forward with her.

We continued to watch TV for about an hour or so and then, after the TV had signed off for the night at about 1:30AM she turned it off, turned on a radio, said something about bed, and got a futon out from the closet. I moved the kotatsu against the wall and she laid out the mattress and quilts in the middle of the floor. Man did it look inviting and I couldn't wait to get into it.

She turned off the kerosene heater and we sat on the floor a little while longer talking and listening to the radio until the smell of the kerosene heater dissipated. Then she closed the window and turned off the radio. I slipped into the futon and she turned out the light leaving only the tiny 5 or 10 watt bulb in the ceiling lamp lit and slipped into bed. Throughout it all I made no advances towards her nor she towards me.

I lay there for a few minutes thinking about this woman, where I was, and the interesting time I had had with her; a woman who called a foreigner out of the blue and asked him out on a date, which was unheard of back then and I am now sleeping in her room! Man, this is an interesting country I remember thinking and I still loved it all. After almost six years of living in this land of the "Rising Sun" I was still amazed, almost on a daily basis, by the differences in culture and thinking. Also, it was ironic that the Japanese person was sleeping in the bed and the foreigner in the futon.

I'd like to say that we ended up making wild passionate love after she quietly slipped into my futon or I her bed, but such was not the case. I just fell asleep and awoke in the morning about the same time as she. I washed up in the kitchen and brushed my teeth. (It's amazing that Japanese people always have a spare new toothbrush on hand for guests and I remember thinking I'll have to also start keeping some spare ones on hand.) She then made us some coffee and afterwards some buttered toast. We talked for a while longer and I left about noon.

We did see each other a couple of more times after that, but it never amounted to anything more than a drink and something to eat. As I mentioned earlier, she was nice and all, but the "spark" was never actually lit for me and I never again took her up on her offer to stay at her place. Had I taken her up on her offer again, or invited her to my place, I know for sure that we would've had sex as I could tell she was really beginning to like me. And that may not have been a good thing in the long run as I could tell she was looking for a relationship and I did not want to selfishly take advantage of her to satisfy my own sexual urges. There were way too many woman out there who would gladly do that without a relationship.

Seeing that she was beginning to fall for me I gradually cut down our dates until I had to come right out with it and tell her one day that I was just not interested in her in a loving way and it wouldn't be fair to her for me to take this relationship any further. I really felt bad as I could see the hurt and rejection in her eyes, but it had to be and I did not want to lead this woman on. I can count on three fingers the number of women I broke up with and Kumiko was one.

Call me crazy, but I am funny in that way. If I am not attracted to a particular woman I cannot sleep with her even though the indications are there. It's just not me. There are exceptions of course, like "two ships passing in the night" or something similar, but this was different in a way that's not easy to put into words.

Kumiko continued working at the bank for about another year and then was gone. Maybe she was transferred to a different branch, maybe she got married. I don't know. If she was the one who waited on me when I went to the bank we just exchanged small talk and that was it. She never called me again nor I her. However, it was an interesting experience and one I'll remember forever as it was rare indeed for a Japanese woman to ask a strange man out back then, especially a foreigner. She was ahead of her time.

Kumiko-chan, I wish you well and it was pleasure meeting you.

Japanese women: Are they subservient and submissive as many in the west believe? Are they shy and docile? Are they immature and childish? Are they fashionable? Are they sex-starved nymphomaniacs or cold fish? Are they as easy to get into bed as some would have you believe? And, do they really treat their man like a king or are they liberated to the extent that they don't need men?

These are questions many western men have asked and one I have come across on many forums and blogs. The answer to the above is both yes and no. It all depends on the woman as well as the man she is with, but one thing I can say for sure is that the one common thread all Japanese women I dated really had was that they know damn well how to take care of their man and make him feel like he is the most important person in the world.

In my younger years in Japan before settling down with the woman I am married to, I had a good 4 -5 years to play the field so to speak after my initial marriage ended in divorce after only two and a half years. It wasn't that the marriage failed because of miscommunication or incompatibility, it ended because I was forced to realize that I married for lust and not love at 20 yrs old. In truth I was not ready for marriage, had not finished playing around, and should've never gotten married at the time. In fact, I married the first woman I met after only being in Japan a month!

After the amicable divorce I vowed to not settle down and marry again, if ever, until I was good and ready to get married. I would not marry again until I was sure that I had had my fun and found a woman that I was completely compatible with on all levels including intellectually and sexually. Impossible you say? I thought so too and figured I may never get married or find the right woman for me, but have patience, date many types of women and you'll eventually find the right one.

Japan can be a wonderful place for a single male. Just don't fall for one because she is great in bed or has a great personality. There are other factors involved. As with women anywhere, she may be great in bed, but is a real bitch otherwise. She may have a great personality, but can't do squat in the bedroom and never will, she may be a great person, but will nag the hell out of you, etc. etc. It's so easy to find and date women in Japan that sooner or later the right one will come along that is just perfect for you and it may be when you were least looking for it!

As a young college student, I had the time of my life and ran the gamut of Japanese women from rich to poor, from nymphomaniac to cold, lifeless fish. I dated OL's (Office Ladies) and bar hostesses; HS students (when I was 19 and in my early 20's) and college students, and a couple of older women in their 30's and 40's. I also dated the truly subservient, submissive well-educated type of woman and, while appealing to many western men however, this type was not at all appealing to me in the long run. And I dated, and married, a liberated woman.

Imagine what it would feel like to walk down the street and have young women squeal and comment on how cute you were. Imagine what it would be like to have women come up to you almost anytime and anywhere to just talk to you or just to meet you. Imagine walking into a strange bar or night club or live house and have women patrons want to sit with you or be asked to be introduced to you just because you were a foreigner. And, if you spoke Japanese, you had an even greater advantage especially in the Japanese only places that you frequented. Granted this didn't happen on a daily basis, but it happened often enough to really take notice of. Yes being a young foreign college student in Japan sure had its advantages.

I almost married a beautiful, rich model, but there were many problems in the relationship so I broke it off. I thought a flight attendant and I might get married, but her father forbade her to see me after meeting me and she broke it off. And I fell in love with and frequently dated for three years the bass player of a fairly popular all-girl band, but she only wanted fun and sex and not a serious relationship. Thanks to her though, I discovered a side of sex that most men only fantasize about. However, if it were not for her I never would've met the woman I am presently married to for 22 years. In time I will write detailed stories of all these relationships.

With the majority of Japanese women I dated and bedded there were practically no taboos when it came to sex. This completely blew me away as it was something I was not used to. Maybe it was because, with the lack of religion in Japan, they were not brainwashed into thinking that sex was something evil and dirty. Japanese women made sex fun and they made kinky seem normal!

Being a shy foreigner in Japan it was quite easy to meet Japanese women as most of the women usually made the first move. If they didn't make the first move because they were shy, it became quite easy for me to approach them with more success than failure after I understood how to read and react to eye contact from them.

Back in the late 70's when disco was popular it was great to go to one of the many discos in Roppongi where you could spend the night for a cover charge of 3,000 yen (about US$15) and it included all you could drink and eat all night! All I and my friends had to do was get there early, find seats near the dance floor, and within 30 minutes or less some Japanese woman, or women, would come up to our table and ask us in English to dance. That was all there was to it! I hardly ever had to ask a woman to dance and if you went home alone or without a phone number it was usually because you wanted to. In most, but not all cases, if she didn't come to your place she would ask you to hers or you would both spend the night in a hotel. Rarely did you go home alone.

To be honest, if I could do it all over again I would gladly trade anything to relive those five years in the late 1970's early 80's when Japan truly was, and probably still is, a paradise for foreign males as far as the opposite sex went.

Even though I dated many types of Japanese women, some seriously, there was always a common thread with them all and that is, as I said above, they made you feel like the most important person in the world. When they came to visit you at your place they usually cleaned your apartment and washed your clothes and even cooked you meals after buying the food! They didn't do it because it was expected of them they did it because they wanted to and cared for you. If we went out together they would often offer to pay for the date or split it, but I never allowed it except in rare cases. And none were ever shy to be with a foreigner in public.

Although a few had little experience in sexual matters and just laid there, most were experienced, knew what a man wanted and when the bedroom door was closed, even the most conservatively dressed, librarian-type of woman could act like a whore and make you glad you were a man. When it came to the bedroom, only one or two were inhibited in my experience. Shy yes, but there almost nothing that was taboo with them. The word immoral was not in their dictionary and what may seem kinky to many westerners was deemed just a normal part of sex to the Japanese women I had relations with.

Many foreign men I knew in Japan often took advantage of these two sides of Japanese women and used them selfishly to their own advantage. They would try and sleep with them on a first date, often successfully, without ever realizing that the woman was giving herself mostly because she was shy and didn't know how to say no as they were not used to a foreigners tactics. Granted there are more than a few "foreigner-experienced" Japanese women who will sleep with any foreigner on a first date, but I am referring to the Japanese woman who has little or no experience with the foreign male and just wants to meet them.

Foreign males would often use a Japanese woman as a kind of slave to clean their apartments, wash their clothes, cook their meals and have sex with and had no plans whatsoever of being truly serious with them. I have seen many men just up and leave the country after dating a particular woman for a year or more much to the detriment and shock of the Japanese woman.

In my own experience I learned about Japanese woman and why they prefer foreign males over their own kind and used that to my advantage when there was one I particularly liked. I would often never try to sleep with them on a first date unless it was they who pushed the issue and made the first move. If they didn't make the first move or I didn't receive the "signals" I would wait a few dates and, more often than not, it was they who crawled all over me and made the first move. It made sex that much more interesting and I feel as if they appreciated it in the long run. In other words I did not want to give them the impression I was just out for sex, especially if they were experienced in dating foreign men as probably 99% of the foreigners they dated probably tried to get into their pants on the first date. Don't get me wrong here, there were more than a few women I slept with after just meeting them that evening as, like two ships passing in the night, it was what we both were looking for, but there was rarely a second or third date.

Being a foreign male in Japan does have its advantages and if one ever wondered what it feels like to be a rock star or someone famous and have women wanting to meet you, all one has to do is go to Japan to experience it. From some of the blogs and posts on forums I have read I gather the same holds true today as it did 30 years ago. Since I have been married for 22 years I have been away from the scene quite a while, but it is nice to know that not much has changed out there for the single foreigner.

Also, in my own experience, since I could speak Japanese almost fluently, I had greater success with women in Japanese only places or places where foreigners rarely, if ever, visited as I was that much more of a curosity to them. The fact that a foreigner could speak Japanese made them that much more interested in you. Besides, it practically tripled your odds in meeting women as many, if they did not speak English, would not approach you or shy away from you if you approached them in English.

Eventually I quit going to places where many foreigners frequented as most of the women there were too "westernized" for my taste. They were clever and sly and knew well how to take advantage of the unsuspecting, horney foreign male looking to get laid. I have seen many a men taken advantage of and/or hurt by them and I was one. Be cautious in these places as these women are experienced and smart in the art of using foreign men. The same goes for hostess bars that are frequented by foreigners.

Still, even today, when I visit Japan and hit all my old spots and a few new ones here and there, the eye contact, curiosity, and interest is still there from women I have never seen before and I know I could "score" again if I acted on it. Granted, the majority of the women eyeing me or talking to me are not in their 20's or early 30's anymore. They are closer to my age, but the interest is still there and I am glad to see that a foreign male, regardless of his age, is still the interest of Japanese women.

END NOTE: Due to the prosperity of Japan and the Japanese the reality is, unlike many other countries, Japanese women do not date foreign males hoping to marry them for a better life outside their own country. They date them and want to meet them because the curiosity is there. Japanese males sadly, for the most part, still treat their women badly especially after marriage and a Japanese woman does enjoy being treated like a lady and not being taken for granted especially when the relationship gets serious.

One downside to this though and one that I hear from quite a few people these days and read of often, is that quite a few Japanese women only want a foreign male as a "boy toy" or fashion accessory with no intention of being serious. If marriage is not your goal then I guess that would be fine as who in their right mind would turn down free sex? On the other hand, I hope you don't fall in love with such a woman. But then again who knows?

And one final note of advice, if you're going out to meet women in Japan, dress well. You don't have to be fashionable or have expensive clothes. Japanese women are usually very conscious of how a man dresses himself and judges him accordingly. Tee shirts and shorts are a turn off to many Japanese women. Dress sharp-casual with clean slacks, (jeans are ok) a nice shirt (preferably button down) and clean sneakers or shoes. You'll have a lot more success.

It is said that foreigners living in Japan for any length of time develop what is known as a love-hate relationship with the country due to culture shock after the initial honeymoon ends. This usually occurs about one to three years in and, depending on how one handles it, will usually determine that persons future outlook and opinion on the country when they depart. For some it may last a year or two and they just learn to accept the country, culture, and laws and go on enjoying their time living there. And for others, they never get over the culture shock and end up despising Japan for everything it is and leave with a bitter taste in their mouth.

I was in the former category as I was two years discharged from the military in-country, a university student, and was grappling with the culture shock of living by myself in Japan away from the American comforts and culture I had known on base for four years.

One must understand that just because one "lives in" Japan with the military it is no different than living in the states as inside the gates you really are in America with the food, housing, culture, shopping, TV, etc. You are only "in" Japan when you walk out the gates. Therefore, living on the base is nowhere near the same as living and working off base. So even though I may have been "in" Japan for six years I was actually "living in" Japan for about two and a half years if that makes any sense. Anyway, I was going through my love-hate relationship with Japan when the following experience occurred.

In Japan a foreigner is required by law to have their Alien Registration Card, commonly called the "Gaijin Card", or his passport on their person at all times when out and about. Failure to produce either document when asked by a policeman can really land one in hot water as I was to find out one night.

Back in the late 70's video rental stores started popping up in Japan and they were promoting a new service where they would copy a full length commercial movie onto a video cassette for the measly price of about 500yen per movie if you provided the cassette or 1,000yen if they provided it. (Record stores started this trend in the early 70's with the copying of albums onto cassette tapes for a similar price.) It didn't matter if it was a US movie or a Japanese movie; the price was still the same and they were copied from laser discs, so the quality was high. This was better than sliced bread at the time as one could now own movies or albums for a fraction of their original cost which were quite high in Japan and view them in the comfort of ones home. I think a music album was selling for about 3- 5,000 yen and a movie would sell for about 15,000 yen back then; very high prices at the time. This was all legal and the record and movie companies didn't start complaining until some years later.

One must remember here that the advent of the home video recorder was only a couple of years old at the time so this was something special and exciting to those that could afford a VCR back then. To be able to watch commercial movies in your own home was just unbelievable at the time.

Anyway, I had become a member of one of these video stores when I purchased my first VCR back in about 1979/1980 (cost me about $1,000 at the time (about 250,000yen!) It was worth every yen back then for this new technology and I started having movies recorded like crazy. The first movie I had recorded was "Casablanca". I was ordering a few movies a week and would always ride my bicycle to order and pick them up.

One night I was returning from the video store at about 11pm on my bicycle when I noticed the familiar flashing red lights of a Japanese police car that had passed me in the opposite lane and made a u-turn to come up behind me. Okay, I thought, they're probably just going to ask me for my gaijin card. No problem. My bicycle light was on so this was just going to be a routine stop. I've been through this a few times in the past several years so I figured no sweat.

I stopped my bicycle and waited for them to come up to me. Two policemen approached from the rear, one on either side of me. Seeing that I was a foreigner one started speaking in really, I mean really, bad broken English.

"Goodu ebiningu sah. Ah you fromu Zama campu?" I answered in English that I was not from the base and that I was a student. Seeing that he was having a little difficulty with the word student I quickly answered in fluent Japanese as I wanted to get back home and watch my new movie. He replied in Japanese that he was surprised that I could speak Japanese and asked what I was doing and where I was going. I told him. He then asked for my gaijin card. "Sure", I replied, and reached around to my back pocket to retrieve it. To my utter astonishment it wasn't there! I realized that I had left it home on my kotatsu (small Japanese table with a heater under it)! What an idiot! This was like the first time I ever left my home without my gaijin card and I get stopped by the police! I think the last time I was asked for my gaijin card was maybe three years previous.

With my heart beating real fast, I told the officer, in the politest Japanese I could muster up, that I left it home and that if they would come to my apartment, I would show it to him. He didn't know what to do and asked his partner. His partner said that they could just take me home and see if it was there and check it. The questioning officer sucked air, scratched the back of his head, and said he was unsure and would have to check with his superiors. As he walked back to his car to get on the radio with his superiors I thought to myself what a couple of morons these two were! Couldn't they make a decision by themselves? This seemed so simple, I thought.

Well, what may seem like a simple solution to foreigners was not as simple to the Japanese as I was about to find out.

After a couple of minutes, the questioning officer returned and said that they would take me home and have a look at my gaijin card. Whew, was I relieved. They loaded my bicycle into the trunk and I got into the back seat for the five minute ride to my apartment.

During the ride the other officer turned to me and said in Japanese, "What kind of movies did you have recorded? Porno movies?" and he laughed. I told him that they were just US movies, but I had a feeling he didn't believe me. What an asshole, I thought to myself. Tonight was not porno movie night. I usually did that on weekends.

When we got to my apartment, they unloaded my bicycle and escorted me into my apartment. They didn't even wait in the genkan (entranceway). They entered my apartment like they belonged there! I showed them that my gaijin card was on my kotatsu and gave it to the questioning officer. He looked it over while the other officer walked around my apartment opening a drawer, my clothes closet and the closet where I kept my futon. I found this rather repulsive and an invasion of my privacy as I didn't think he had a right to do that. But I didn't say anything as it was I who broke the law and could've been arrested or taken in for not having my gaijin card on me. I felt I was real lucky for not being taken in.

The questioning officer said that everything was ok and said he was just going out to the car to let his superiors know. Before leaving he mentioned that he was surprised that I had a typical Japanese apartment with no furniture other than a TV, a desk, a clothes closet, and a few small cabinets (also known as "Color Boxes" in Japan) that held my phone and other personal effects. I told him that I was very comfortable living this way and rather enjoyed it. He said that he expected to find a typical American style living arrangement with a sofa, coffee table, kitchen table, etc.

Anyway, he went out to the patrol car and the other officer just made small talk about the university I was attending, if I liked Japanese food, etc. etc. All the things I have been asked a countless number of times before by Japanese people and I answered as politely as I could.

After a few minutes the questioning officer came back in, bowed and apologized to me because he would have to take me in to the station! WHAT? It seems his superiors had checked the regulations and the regulations said that any foreigner that did not have his gaijin card with him at the time of being asked for it had to be taken to the police station. This was really turning into a nightmare now. I had showed them my gaijin card. It was legal. It proved I was a student. Why in God's name did they have to take me to the station? Just because I didn't have my gaijin card on my person a mere 5 minutes distance from my apartment? Can't anyone in this country make a decision by themselves? Must they always go word for word by the book?

In Japan, the sad answer is yes as everyone is afraid to make a decision for themselves. I had seen this before in any number of situations in Japan where no one is willing to make a decision without first checking the rules, or with their superiors, or with the group. When in doubt (which they always seem to be), they go by the book. Well, it seems even this officer's superiors couldn't make a decision on this one either, and even THEY had to check with the regulations and were going by the book. How simple, I thought, would it be for someone to say, "Ok, no problem. Your gaijin card is in order, just don't forget it again." Case closed. But nooooo. Not in Japan.

So, the questioning officer apologized again and offered to give me a ride back home after questioning. Big deal! I thought. Thanks a lot! I was then driven to the police station in Zama city where I was questioned for almost two hours! This may surprise some as it sure as hell surprised the hell out of me. But not only did they ask for information about me, but also about my family, my mother and father, my brothers and sisters, their names, addresses, ages, names and ages of their husbands/wives, children, if any, and just about anything you could think of. The information was extremely personal and quite unnecessary and a severe invasion of my privacy. But this was their country and I had broken their law. I was probably questioned as they would question any Japanese, as they were reading from a book on this interrogation!

Although I gave the correct names of my family I gave them false addresses as I figured this was none of their business and if they did check, and it was found to be false, I would just tell them that they must've moved. They never checked. It was just routine questioning they probably ask of anyone and everyone, Japanese or not.

After this questioning was over, I was informed that I would receive a summons to appear in court in Yokohama and that it would be in my best interest to have a formal letter of apology ready to hand to the judge so that he may go light on me. Go light on me? I thought. What for? For not having my gaijin card on me? Jeeze, what a strict country! And how senseless, I thought, for something as simple as not having one's gaijin card on their person. I was also told that I could receive a financial penalty, be deported from the country, or maybe even receive some jail time! Oh great. Now I may be even kicked out of the country for just forgetting my gaijin card. (I really didn't think I would receive any jail time for such a small infraction.) And with only a year or so left until graduation to boot!

I was then taken home by the same two officers who apologized to me again. I was then summoned back to the police station a week or so later for further questioning by two detectives who asked me the same questions I answered previously. How redundant. But hey, this is Japan. Live in Japan and you live by their rules and laws no matter how silly I think they might be.

Well, in Japan, as the old saying goes, their bark is worse than their bite. I received my notice to appear in court in Yokohama about two months later. I dressed in a suit and had my letter of apology in hand, written in Japanese by a friend of mine to ensure there were no mistakes and who also went with me to court. I appeared before the judge and the charges against me were read. I bowed real low, apologized, and handed my formal letter of apology to him. After he read it he said that I had broken a law and that since I was remorseful, no action would be taken against me. However, he said that if I was caught without my gaijin card again I could receive jail time, be fined, be deported from the country or all three! I was then dismissed with no fine or other action against me. I bowed real low and left.

As we rode the train home I reflected on the hassle and worry I went through these past couple of months for something as simple (to me) as not having my gaijin card on my person when asked for it. But it did not diminish my view on Japan or my love for the country as this was the law where I was residing and, like any Japanese person, I was expected to obey the law no matter how inane and senseless it seemed to me.

In Japan rules are rules and the law is the law, and everyone is expected, and required to, follow the law, but the courts are really quite lenient when one shows true remorse as I was to find out later on when I got busted for possession of an illegal substance.

Needless to say, I never forgot my gaijin card again and I recommend that if you live in, or are visiting Japan, do not get caught without your gaijin card or passport as you just may be in for the hassle of your life.

Pachinko, an upright pinball machine, is a "legalized" form of gambling in Japan where gambling is illegal and today, if one is lucky and knows when to quit, it is possible to make a living out of playing it. This is the story of how I survived for about ten months playing only pachinko.

I started playing Pachinko while in the military back in 1973 when, out of curiosity, I entered a small place near the base. It soon became one of my favorite past times when I had nothing better to do. Since I was so green to Japan at the time with barely any knowledge of the language, I never won more than a couple of thousand yen on the rare days that I did win. Back then yen was 300/US$1 so my winnings never totaled more than $10-$13, but it was still good money when your monthly salary was about $360 a month and a beer cost 300 yen at a bar.

Also, all the machines were manual at the time in that you had to shoot the balls by operating a lever with your thumb and hope the balls would fall into one of the five or so "tulips" placed strategically on the board where you would win 15 balls for opening the tulip and 15 more for closing it (which was much easier than opening it.) 30 balls cost 100 yen. I found it intriguing

and it was a good way to pass a rainy Saturday afternoon before hitting the nightspots as a few hours seemed like a few minutes. Also, it was interesting to see how lucky one could get. Most of my friends found it boring, but I enjoyed it.

I had heard that gambling was illegal in Japan and since I had only a rudimentary knowledge of Japanese at the time I didn’t know that you could convert your winnings into cash. Therefore, I only took my winnings in the prizes like lighters, cigarettes, or food and snacks that I would store in my room on the base. After I heard about the loophole in the law from my Japanese friends that you could win cash by exchanging small packets of flint at a little kiosk off the premises, I always took my winnings in cash. Winning cash seemed to make it that much more interesting and fun. After all there was only so many lighters or "Cup O' Noodle" one could have. At this time I also did not know any of the techniques of playing the game like looking at the width of the pins above the tulips or judging the speed of the balls. I just watched where everyone else was placing their ball when maneuvering the lever and I did the same.

I continued playing it every now and then and became an avid player in my college days beginning in 1977. I didn't win much and on some days I would lose two or three thousand yen while on others I would profit anywhere from four to seven thousand yen for a minimum investment. I didn't play but maybe 2-3 times a week, but I usually won more than I lost as I learned how to "read" the machines by the width of the pins and the speed of the balls.

By 1980 all machines had been converted to automatic in that there was now a handle that one turned to adjust the speed and placement of the balls instead of a manually operated lever that often left regular players with a calloused thumb and middle finger and the speed of the balls was controlled electronically by computer. Also, instead of just tulips for the balls to fall into, the center area had things like the wings of an airplane that would open once or twice when a ball fell into one of three holes and this increased the speed of the game and your winnings. If a ball fell into a small center hole (which was only the width of the ball itself) in this center piece, a "bonus" would be paid in that the wings would open 10 times in succession. For each ball that fell in, 15 would come out. And, during this "bonus time", if another ball happened to fall into the center hole before 10 balls fell into the other two wide holes, you could continue up to 10 times. If this happened 5 or 6 times in a short period of time, you would win about 2,500-3,000 balls which was equal to about 5,000-7,000 yen in winnings. The machine would be closed and you either left with your winnings or continued playing on another machine. Also, it usually took anywhere from an hour or two to five, six, or maybe even seven hours to "close" a machine if you were lucky enough to find a "good" one.

If anyone knows anything about Pachinko it is this: YOU ALWAYS WIN ON THE FIRST FEW DAYS OF A PARLOR INSTALLING NEW MACHINES. The machines are loose and maybe 90% of the people win to entice them to come back with their winnings. After a couple of days things return to normal. About 2-3 times per year a parlor will install new machines. Not all the machines are replaced. Maybe 20-50 or more depending on the size of the parlor, but it's enough to fill the place with customers for a few days as all machines are loose.

Sometime in early 1981 a new type of pachinko machine was introduced called the "Fever" and "Bravo" type that would change the industry forever.

I was in my senior year at Sophia University and a contract I had teaching had just expired and I was in between jobs and wondering what I was going to do for money. Do I sign a new contract with them or maybe find something different closer to home or that paid more?

I had just gotten off the train about 5pm and was walking home when I heard the familiar music of a pachinko parlor indicating that they had new machines. Back then they used to hire a group of musicians in traditional garb who played the flute, drums and a cymbal like instrument outside. Now they just have a bunch of huge artificial flowers outside and include fliers in the newspapers. One can always tell when a place has new machines when you see 100 or so people lined up outside about 3 or 4pm on the first day and around noon on the second and third day.

Why not give it a shot I thought. It was free money and I could always use 4 or 5,000 yen. The place was already opened and I went in. Practically 75% of the machines had been replaced with a new type that I had never seen before. They were called "Bravo" and "Fever" machines. They were the first computerized, digitalized pachinko machines and would change the industry, the speed of the game, and payouts, forever. Instead of the familiar wings of an airplane or something else in the center that would open when a ball went into a special slot, this was a new type that had what looked like a slot machine in the center.

The "Bravo" type of machine had three digitalized numbers, and the "Fever" type resembled a slot machine in that the center three reels would spin. The place was packed and luckily I found an empty "Bravo" machine. I looked around and saw that a lot of people had large boxes of balls sitting on the floor. More than I had ever seen before. Wow, I thought, this place is really loose.

I sat down and put in my usual 200 yen for 60 balls.